How to Make Friends in College

“ I would rather walk with a friend in the dark than alone in the light, "

This quote by Hellen Keller conveys how having a friend can spark our lives. Understanding how to make friends in college will give you a clear direction to connect with other students and develop social skills. College students are in a phase where they lose some old friends and meet some of their best buddies for life. Students who have just started college may find it challenging to make friends and connect with other students. If you are seeking help for making friends in college, or wondering how to make new friends this guide will help. 

Different ways to make new friends

1. Be confident and start with a conversation with your classmates

You will be with students you don't know and complete strangers to you. You must make efforts in the initial stage and reach out to your classmates. The key to starting a conversation is to be confident to make a good impression in college. Being confident and trying to start a conversation will help you to connect with people, and eventually, they will start liking your company. Start with small steps at the beginning. In this way, you will take a step forward to make friends. 

• Be confident and start slow. Start with a general conversation, like your name, native country, schooling, etc.
• Take a genuine interest in the conversation. Be natural and try to listen to what that person is telling you. 
• Come up with catchy topics to start the conversation, like favourite sports or favourite actors.
• Ask them about their favourite web series and movies. Movies and series are something that everyone watches. It is a great topic to start with. 
• Be available if they need help. This will create a good impression in their mind, and they will look up to you. 
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‍2. Attending Orientation

Student Orientation, often known as Freshman week, is a university-sponsored event that attempts to introduce you to new people and provide you with essential information about your new community. The fresher’s week will enable you to meet new people, learn about your college course, and learn about the campus and students union if there are any. There will be many things that you will be unaware of and get to know in college orientation.  

• Try to get to know new people in the orientation. Start with a general introduction and then go with the flow. 
• Engage in conversation with those who share your interests, and look up to them. After a general introduction and a little conversation, you will get to know who shares likely interests. 
• See if they seem to enjoy your presence. You can observe their facial expressions and gestures and whether they like your presence. 
• You can start hanging out with the ones who like your company. After knowing whether they enjoy your presence, you can start hanging out with them more often. 
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‍3. Join Clubs in your college

There are student clubs in every college that organise and manage several events for the students. Joining college clubs will help you know more about the college activities, and there will be many other students you will meet. You will get to know your classmates better. Being active will eliminate the stress of finding and socialising with people. You will have the advantage of meeting, bonding and hanging out with people. You can also join online student communities.

• Take part in the events arranged by the clubs. Taking part in events will boost your confidence while allowing you to socialise with others. 
• Try to socialise with the people you are taking part in the events. You can start slow and go according to the flow. 
• Be an active member of the College Club. This will enable you to communicate with new members of the club. You will also get to develop some essential skills like leadership skills and public speaking skills. 
• Try to help others if you are an expert in any domain. For example, if you are good at dancing, you can help others who have just started dancing and are unaware of the steps or moves. 
• Come out of your comfort zone and make an effort. You need to get comfortable with discomfort to come out and make an impact.
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‍4. Invite people to hang out with you

Instead of waiting for others to come and call you, you can take the initiative yourself. You can start by asking them to grab a meal together or head to the library or gym. Don't worry about stressing about people seeing you as weird or desperate. Making connections requires putting yourself out there, and there are chances that other people will value the effort. 

• Trying to do activities together, such as going for lunch, working out, and studying together, is a great way to socialise and keep your busy schedule aside. 
• If you are not much into partying, you can call your fellow friends to watch a series together or for a movie night. 
• Try to spend more time with people you have started to know and are connecting with. 

‍5. Be patient and don't be afraid of rejection

If you think you will hang out a few times and instantly your classmates will turn into your besties, that is not the case most of the time. You need to keep trying and wait for how it goes and whether they also give you the same reaction or not. It may also happen that the person is not your type and is unwilling to make friends with you. You should not be afraid of rejection, be patient, and give time if you want a genuine friendship.

• Making new friends may not be your favourite thing as there is a fear of getting rejected and things not going as expected. 
• A person who has faced rejection several times, betrayal or a troubled past may be insecure about accepting rejection and making the first move. 
• Don't be sad instead, be proud that you made efforts and made your first move. 

6. Be Honest and Voice your opinion

Being honest is helpful and morally correct when it comes to making friends. To make friends, you don’t need to conceal your emotions or be fake. You need to be yourself and voice your opinions no matter what. Some students choose the wrong path to make friends, that is, by faking it and trying to fit into the ‘clique’. If you do not express yourself, you will lose your individuality and be lost in the crowd. Stop worrying about the problems as solution for every problem.

• Make friends without losing your individuality. 
• Voice your opinions, and don't be afraid of being unique. 
• Be yourself and don’t get influenced by anyone. 

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Tip: Read our guide on the common problems faced by students and their solutions. Tackle all your problems easily.

‍7. Dealing with social anxiety

Some college students struggle with social anxiety, preventing them from opening up or approaching new people. There is always a social discomfort among them and a fear of being judged or humiliated by others. In this case, you can consult a therapist and practice cognitive reframing. This will develop your social attitude and make you feel less conscious in college. You will experience overall personality development and can approach and hang out with people in college without having fear. 

• Set small goals for yourself, like making eye contact or waving at people in college.
• Try having a virtual conversation with your classmates if you are not comfortable talking to them in person.
• Make it a priority to practice social skills every day, including your body language and practise talking in front of a mirror. 
• Say yes to invitations, as this shows that you are interested in hanging out with your classmates.‍

After you follow the steps in this guide, there is an observation stage. In this stage, you need to determine whether the people you approach do something to show they value you. This simply means that after taking all the effort and trying to make friends, it's time that they show some interest and give you a positive signal that they are interested in being friends with you. They can simply do this by texting you and taking the initiative to invite you. If it is a mutual connection and effort from both sides, you will mutually become friends. Over time, you will get in regular contact with friends and eventually turn into true friends.